1 Oh that face mask must really protect you, from being good at softball
2 Oh you shake your bat when you fake bunt on 3-0, I'm sure you fooled everyone into thinking you're bunting
3 Oh, coach only puts you in when you have a 10 run lead? She's probably just saving you for playoffs.
4 Oh, somebody hits for you? I'm sure its just so that you can save yourself for right field.
5 Oh, the center fielder forgot to yell fence and you ran into it? She's probably over the fact that you cheated on her.
6 Oh, the coach on the other team told everyone to move in? Im sure it's just because he wanted everyone to see how pretty you are.
7 Oh, the ump called you out on a 3rd strike? You're right he HAS got to be kidding you.
8 Oh, theres 2 down 1 to go you said 2 down 1 to go? Thanks for your help.
9 Oh, there's 2 ducks on the pond? Well then you better get a hit... quack quack.
10 Oh, you bat .550 for a community college? I bet you'd bat the same in division l.
11 Oh, you can't hit a change up? It's probably because you're too good to hit slow pitching.
12 Oh, you caught a ball in the outfield and "dove" 3 seconds later? No it looked good though.
13 Oh, you could have gone D1 but your high school coach hated you? I feel really bad for you, such a waste of quality talent.
14 Oh, you could have played at Alabama but you wanted to stay local? Your community college must be REALLY good then if they cut you
15 Oh, you cut your hair short like a boy? At least you're keeping every body guessing.
16 Oh, you cut your leg sliding? Make sure you keep showing it to people everyday, it helps the healing process.
17 Oh, you dropped that pop fly after it hit your glove? I didn't realize the sun being in your eyes prohibited you from closing your glove.
18 Oh, you gave up 3 home runs this inning? Maybe the rise ball isn't working, or the change up.
19 Oh, you got to second because of an overthrow to first? Check your phone when you get back to the dugout Team USA will be calling you.
20 Oh, you grunt when your pitch? I thought we were playing softball not tennis.
21 Oh, you have skin showing between your pants and your socks? Sports illustrated wants you for their next cover.
22 Oh, you have to sprint to 1st on a walk? Your coach is probably really fun to be around.
23 Oh, you have to throw with the same person every day? Don't mix it up...the world might end.
24 Oh, you jump on home plate when you hit a homerun? Way to show that plate who's boss
25 Oh, you just hit 10 foul balls in the 3rd base dugout? No you're right on it, only takes 1.
26 Oh, you know more than your coach? You should probably tell her that and soon because it will more than likely help you get in the line up.
27 Oh, you like Jenny Finch because she's a girly softball player? She could bench press your whole family... and the dog
28 Oh, you made a bad throw to first? Are you ok? You keep grabbing your arm and twisting it like you pulled a muscle.
29 Oh, you made a double play? I'm sure most people would celebrate like they won the world series too.
30 Oh, you made an error? I didn't even realize tightening the strap on your glove fixes it, better luck next time.
31 Oh, you missed that ball? Maybe if you look in your glove long enough it will appear.
32 Oh, you play 3rd and you always stand 15 ft from any batter incase of a bunt? I don't like your teeth anyway.
33 Oh, you play softball and you're straight? I thought that you didn't exist.
34 Oh, you see a gap and Sally's going shopping? Yeah, she needs new jeans.
35 Oh, you slap your back with your bat? You must hit the ball really hard.
36 Oh, you spent an hour and a half doing your hair and 20 minutes warming up? At least that power braid helps you hit the ball.
37 Oh, you struck out in tee ball? Unfortunately, you might not have USA softball potential.
38 Oh, you think that other travel team sucks? It doesn't have anything to do with the fact that they cut you, does it?
39 Oh, you think the new freshman short stop is cute? So does her boyfriend... Just give it a month.
40 Oh, you threw a wild pitch on a pitch out? Coach isn't mad at you, she always breaks her clipboard in the 7th inning.
41 Oh, you threw your helmet at the dugout after you struck out? At least you hit something today.
42 Oh, you throw side arm? Everybody appreciates your solid mechanics.
43 Oh, you want to play for Team USA? Keep striking out looking that ought to help.
44 Oh, you wear a hat when you play and you're not from Canada? I bet your girlfriend is very proud of you.
45 Oh, you wear a ribbon in your hair? It must me because your gods gift to softball.
46 Oh, you wear a sliding pad on each leg even though you always slide on the same leg? Better safe than sorry, oh wise one.
47 Oh, you wear a visor, sunglasses, and eye black? I hope the sun doesn't get in your eyes.
48 Oh, you wear long sliders and short shorts? No it looks good on you though.
49 Oh, you wear sunglasses with a helmet? Will you please tell me what it's like to be so cool.
50 Oh, you went down looking? Coach thought the third strike was a ball too.
51 Oh, you were 1 for 14 this weekend? Stay hot kid, stay hot.
52 Oh, you were 1 for 6 with a homerun? Yeah, you should be on the front cover of Sport Illustrated.
53 Oh, your a slapper? What's it like to be mortal enemies with the outside change-up?
54 Oh, your boyfriend plays baseball? I'm sure it's really romantic when your raspberries touch.
55 Oh, your team is nationally ranked? I didn't realize the rankings went to 294.
56 Oh, your whole team has movie night for team bonding? Most people call that date night.
57 Oh, your'e a pitcher and you cant throw overhand to 1st base? It's ok a lot of people have a hard time throwing 15 feet.
58 Oh, you're a righty batter but coach turned you into a slapper? I'm sure it's not because you were batting .092.
59 Oh, you're going through a hitting slump? I'm not sure, but after 2 years can you still call it that?
60 Oh, you're left handed? You must be the second coming of Jesus.
61 Oh, you're more worried about your batting average than if the team wins? Coach really appreciates your enthusiasm.
62 Oh, you're pissed theres no softball in the olympics anymore because you could have made it? I'm pissed too, your chances were good.
63 Oh, you've worn your team sweatpants every days this week? That's dedication.
64 Oh,you made 4 errors at short today?Make sure your family is at your game tomorrow,they'll want to see if the new short stop is good or not.
65 Oh,your whole team goes out together every saturday night?Yeah thats probably what coach meant when she wanted more team bonding activities.
66 You don't wear socks or a sliding pad? You should be careful that cut will look bad with a skirt... Oh right I forgot
67 You slid into first? Must have been such a close play. You're still out
68 Your helmet has your name spray painted on it? What D1 school will you be attending?
69 You're too good to use 2 hands when you catch the ball? The batter agrees, she also says thanks she hasn't been on base all day until now.
70 You're wearing Jennie finch equipment head to toe? You're probably just as good as her
71 Oh, the cops are coming because you stole my base? I'm sure they'll let you off for being a 1st time offender.